The Four Loves

The affection, friendship, eros, and charity: Lewis distinguishes four ways of loving, their greatness and their pitfalls. Written the year of Joy’s death, by a man who discovered love late in life.

Lewis begins by distinguishing need-love (the child running to its mother) and gift-love, then love for nature and homeland. He then describes four loves, using Greek words. Affection (storgē), the humblest, that of family and old habits, can turn into possessiveness. Friendship (philia), which he believes moderns neglect, arises when two people discover they share the same passion; it looks side by side, whereas love looks face to face. Eros, romantic love, is beautiful but can become a demanding god. Finally, charity (agapē), God’s love, does not replace but heals and transforms the other three. The principle running through the whole book: a natural love that becomes a god becomes a demon.

• Original title — The Four Loves
• First published — 1960
• Genre — Essay
• First English edition — Geoffrey Bles, London, 1960
• Availability in bookstores — Available (Pierre Téqui, 2019).
• Reading level — Intermediate
• For whom — For adults, believers or not. The chapter on friendship stands alone and can convince anyone.
• Year — 1960

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• The Four Loves — Raphaël — Le Mont-Pèlerin — 2005 — first French translation; Denis Ducatel, the translator, ran Éditions Raphaël
• The Four Loves — Pierre Téqui — 2019 — published August 28, 2019 — Paris — Denis Ducatel and Jean-Léon Müller

themes

• Need-love and gift-love.
• Friendship, “the least jealous love.”
• The distortions of each love (possessiveness, closed circles, idolatry).
• Charity that transfigures.

In brief

• Friendship: Lewis distinguishes four ways of loving, their greatness and their pitfalls. Written the year of Joy’s death, by a man who discovered love late in life.
• Family
• Apologetics and spirituality

Other names

• The Four Loves
• Essay
• Spirituality

Affection, friendship, eros, and charity: Lewis distinguishes four ways of loving, their greatness and their pitfalls. Written the year of Joy’s death, by a man who discovered love late in life.

Quick facts

## Par où the friendship is approached

Le livre en quelques lignes

Lewis begins by distinguishing between need-love (a child running to its mother) and gift-love, then love for nature and country. He then describes four loves using Greek words. Affection (storge), the humblest, love of family and old habits, can turn into possessiveness. Friendship (philia), which Lewis believes is neglected by moderns, arises when two people discover they share the same passion; it looks side by side, whereas love looks face to face. Eros, romantic love, is beautiful but can become a demanding god. Finally, charity (agape), God’s love, does not replace but heals and transforms the other three loves. The principle running through the book is that a natural love which becomes a god becomes a demon.

Dans l’atelier de Lewis

The book originated from a series of talks recorded in London in 1958 for an American Episcopal foundation. They were considered too frank about sexuality by some American listeners. The chapter on friendship is enriched by twenty years of Inklings.

Ce qui y annonce Narnia

Lewis’s views on friendship are reflected in the friendships of the Pevensie children, Jill and Eustace, Shasta and Aravis. The possessive affection is that of the Lady of the Green Kirtle with Rilian.

Ce qu’en retient un lecteur d’aujourd’hui

Our era talks much about love and little about friendship: it is precisely what Lewis already reproached moderns for. His chapter on friends looking “side by side” rather than “face to face” remains one of the finest pages written on the subject, and his warning against possessive affection speaks to all families.

La trace qu’il a laissée

A classic reflection on love, often given to young married couples and studied in philosophy classes. It was only translated into French in 2005.

Les idées à retenir

• Need-love and gift-love.
• Friendship, “the least jealous of loves.”
• The pitfalls of each love (possession, closed circles, idolatry).
• Charity that transforms.

À citer

“Friendship arises at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’”
— The Four Loves, ch. 4 — translation from the site

Le lire en français

• The Four Loves, Raphaël, Le Mont-Pèlerin, 2005, trans. Denis Ducatel, director of Éditions Raphaël — first French translation
• The Four Loves, Pierre Téqui, Paris, 2019, trans. Denis Ducatel and Jean-Léon Müller — released August 28, 2019

On screen

Lewis’s audio recordings (1958) exist and have been published.

Voir aussi

• Les Inklings, a literary club
• Susan, Orual and Joy: the “Lewis misogynistic” file reopened, with new evidence
• Joy Davidman and “Les Ombres du cœur”
• The lexicon of Jack: twelve of Lewis’s ideas and the Narnia scene that shows them

Sources

• https://www.pintswithjack.com/csl-in-france/
• https://lafree.ch/les-livres-de-c-s-lewis-traduits-en-francais/
• https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Four_Loves